A straight-talking guide for parents
Most people who contact me about a young person aren't the young person.
They're a parent who has watched something change over months, sometimes years. Who has tried talking to them, tried leaving them to it, tried the GP, tried not making it worse. Who is now doing exactly what you're doing at this moment, which is looking for somebody who might be able to help.
This page is written for you rather than for them. It answers the questions parents actually ask me on the phone, including the awkward ones, and it tells you honestly where this work helps and where it doesn't.
Ages, boundaries and background checks
I see young people from around 10 years old upwards, as well as teenagers, students, and adult children in their twenties and thirties.
Below the age of 10 I work less often. The language has to be different, children that young respond differently, and there is often a better place for a parent to start. If your child is younger than that, get in touch anyway and I'll tell you honestly whether I'm the right person, or whether something else would serve them better.
I hold a current DBS check, and you can read about my background and training on my Meet Darren page.
The question behind almost every enquiry
This is the question behind almost every call I take from a parent, so here's a straight answer rather than a comfortable one.
I can't fix somebody from the outside. Nobody can, and anyone who tells you otherwise isn't being straight with you. Hypnotherapy isn't done to a person while they sit there resisting it. It works with them, which means they have to be willing to turn up and see what happens.
Willing is a much lower bar than motivated, though, and that distinction matters. Plenty of young people arrive unconvinced, slightly embarrassed, and there mainly because a parent asked them to come. That's workable, and it works more often than you'd think. What isn't workable is somebody marched in against their will who has already decided it won't do anything.
So the honest test isn't “do they want to change”. It's “will they come and give it a go”. If the answer is yes, this work does very well. If it's no, I'd rather tell you that now than take your money and disappoint you.
If you want to understand the work before you raise it with them, What Is Clinical Hypnotherapy? explains it properly.
Respecting the person in the room
They're my client, not you.
The work is theirs, the room is theirs, and what they tell me stays with me. I won't be able to report back on what came up, even where you're the one paying, and even where your worry is entirely justified.
I know that's hard when you're the one lying awake about it. But that confidentiality is exactly what makes a young adult willing to be honest in the room, and without honesty in the room, very little happens.
What I can do is talk to you first, before anything is booked, so you can think through what's going on and decide whether it's worth suggesting to them. That call is free and there's nothing attached to it.
Consent, privacy and safeguarding
The work is structured differently for younger clients, and I'll explain exactly what that looks like before anything is booked.
Support for the whole young person
Each topic below links straight to the relevant service page where one is available. If you don't see exactly what you're looking for, call me and ask.
The child who can't switch off, imagines the worst, or has quietly stopped doing things they used to enjoy.
GCSEs, A levels, university finals, driving tests, auditions and trials.
The young person who is capable but convinced they aren't, or has started pulling away from friendships.
Needles, being sick, dogs, flying, the dark, spiders or school. Children often respond extremely well.
Nail biting, hair pulling, thumb sucking and bedwetting — habits that often have little to do with willpower. Younger children can surprise themselves.
Trouble getting off to sleep, waking in the night, or the busy mind that starts at bedtime.
Support for calming the mind, managing frustration and holding attention on what matters.
Usually with older teenagers and adult children who have decided it has got out of hand.
The talented young athlete or musician who performs in training and freezes in competition.
The twenty-something at home who has stalled, lost direction, or lost confidence after something went wrong.
Demystifying the process
Parents usually picture something far stranger than the reality.
There's no unconsciousness, no loss of control, and nothing resembling stage hypnosis. Your child stays fully aware throughout. They can hear everything, they can talk, and they can stop at any point. It feels much like being absorbed in a film, or those last few minutes before sleep. Relaxed, focused, and entirely ordinary.
We start with a 60-minute consultation to understand what's going on, what's already been tried, and what they want to be different. Every session after that runs 90 minutes: an hour of hypnosis, and half an hour either side for catching up, talking it through, and setting the focus for next time.
They'll leave with a recording and something practical to use at home in between, and I stay in touch between sessions to see what's working and what isn't. Younger children generally find the whole thing easy, and rather enjoy it.
Sessions are in person at Markham House in Wokingham, or online by Google Meet anywhere in the UK.
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Safeguarding comes first
There are times when I'd tell you to start somewhere else, and I'd rather say that here than on the phone after you've got your hopes up.
If your child is in crisis, is self-harming, has talked about not wanting to be here, or has stopped eating properly, the first call is to your GP rather than to me. That isn't me passing you on. It's that those situations need medical support in place first, and this work sits alongside that rather than instead of it.
If you're not sure which side of that line you're on, ring me and ask. I'd far rather have that conversation than have you sit on it wondering.
A calm, honest first conversation
The easiest first step is a free phone call. No charge, no obligation, and no pressure to book anything.
You can tell me what's been happening, I'll tell you honestly whether I think I can help, and if I can, I'll explain what the work would involve and what it costs. Costs vary depending on what we're dealing with, which is why I'd rather give you a real figure on the phone than a vague one here. If I don't think I'm the right person, I'll say so and point you somewhere better.
I've worked with over 3,790 clients across Wokingham, Berkshire, Surrey, Hampshire and online across the UK.
Get in touch
Call, WhatsApp, or send a message online. Tell me what's happening and I'll come back to you personally.
To book a free 20-minute phone consultation, just fill in the form.There’s no online booking link, which helps keep the system clear and avoids time being held for missed appointments or unanswered calls.
